IMPOSTER SYNDROME
Recently, I have questioned my place in the art world at Stanford. Before college, I practiced photography independently without formal instruction. Taking classes and incorporating photography into my academic pursuits challenged how I viewed art and my position as an artist. I felt like all of my work had to be supported by grandeur concepts and meaning, and I could not create without explicit reason – shooting “just for fun” did not seem to be valued or a legitimate way of practicing my art. I had to put in 110% to my work, and because I am balancing school with my art, this seemed like an impossible task to live up to compared to art practice majors. In addition, a professor called my work for MINT “too commercial,” which made me feel like a large sector of my work was alienated from the academic art community.
With this newfound pressure to create, participate in gallery shows, and pursue art as a purely intellectual field, I started to question whether or not my work belonged in Stanford’s art community and my intentions as a photographer. Thoughts like…
“Am I focused enough?”
“Do I put enough thought into my work?”
“I always feel like others are doing more, doing better than I am.”
“Do I need some grand philosophical quest to be an artist?”
“Does my work matter? Do people care?”
“I don’t belong here.”
Crept into my head after numerous failed attempts to become more involved in the arts. I realized I could not be the only one with these doubts, so I wanted to explore how other student artists felt about their experience at Stanford and outside. Each portrait of a student is paired with a quote from responses about their experience with imposter syndrome.
Ultimately, I have tried to accept that it is okay for me to still be exploring my aims as a photographer, and having multiple sectors of interest does not make my work any less valid. Not everybody will like your work, but find the people that support you and help you grow. I interviewed just a small sector of art students, but even then, it shows that we are not alone in our struggles to feel like we belong. Please reach out to me if you have any questions or want to be part of this project – I will be continuing to interview students about their experiences.
